Smaller then expected.

The world is, so to say.

I've already vented my predilection for Mikael Niemi (which may be considered a bit extravagant in these latitudes since only his first book was translated into my native dialect). But, go read yourself, I'm too lazy to write a review. In Mannen som dog som en lax he describes how people thought that in the [as I reckon] mainly Finnish-speaking environment, their children wouldn't catch Finnish if their parents spoke only Swedish to them. Well, Niemi puts that better.
The other day I was hanging on the CouchSurfing chat. Talking to people and such. I met a guy from Luleå. Well, I didn't know at first that he was from somewhere there. He just said something that evoked the dry Finnish sense of humor, you know, a thing that seems so self-evident and so stupid that you wonder whether the person means it or what the hell. It's irony so ironical that it's barely recognizable and it took me quite long to be able to recognize it. Anyhow, I asked the guy whether he was Finnish and he said No, but my father is. And the guy didn't know a word in Finnish because 'his parents didn't teach him'. Totally Niemi. As if the guy stepped out of the books. Or maybe fiction is not as fictious as it's generally thought.

I seem to have lost powers of expression. Le sigh.

Bloody stupid

I was doing laundry and out of sheer laziness, I tossed the pointe shoes to the washing machine and washed them at 60 celsius. The ribbons turned ugly grey and I have an excellent opportunity to find out what's inside Gaynor-Mindens.

I could've guessed that. Bloody stupid.

Pathetic

I do hate food shopping. The basic categories of food are those which I don't like, those which I cannot afford and those I shouldn't eat.
For example sandwiches. I shouldn't eat too much carbs, they make me bloated and sick. But, a sandwich uses around 100 grams of bread which is not going to be that bad. What next, cheese? No, cannot eat cheese. Not most of them and parmesan-based sandwich is no big deal. I do have dairy binges when I stuff myself with lactase and then I drink a bottle of milk and top it with a nice bit of cheese and some ice cream. Not cheese sandwich, what then. Iceberg lettuce is outside the range of affordable veggies and so are peppers or aubergines (nice when grilled). Okay, they have broccoli. Broccoli stems are cool. Now, meat. No ham, no salami, processed meat makes me sick. And, I don't like it that much. Roastbeef is outside the affordable range. I'll get chicken, boil it and cut into nice pieces of meat. Some tofu could do, too.
I would like to have some cookies. Carbs make me sick. And I should be dieting, after all. Some frozen veggies.... I've been eating so much frozen vegetables that they make me sick anyway. Hey, they've those lovable ginger cookies. I'll take them, it's a small box and they won't kill me. Then the usual kilo of chocolate. On the way toward chocolate aisle I discover the lovable ginger cookies in sales shelf. Mildly damaged boxes. I go and return the non-damaged pack and get three instead. I seem to feel somewhat comfier when I have lots of food at home although I don't eat that much apart from my binges of food that makes me sick. But I never claimed that I'm free of issues. I get more cookies, I get chocolate, I get round-grain rice for risotto milanese, small portions only, I got saffron downtown the other day. In the spice shop where they have everything, which is located across the road from the bakery where they have rye bread. My fave café around the corner, school two blocks away, tourist hell all around.
Then some more frozen fish, I need proteins. Most of them end up in the freezer because I'm lazy to cook just for myself and end up eating the cookies (and being sick).
I know, I'm whiny. There are people who have worse limitations. There are worse things than me being sick. I even have to admit that since I cut on carbs, I feel better indeed. Just now only the unplanned and uncontrolled gulp of milk is reminding me of my bad plumbing. I just need my time to somehow adjust to the whole thing and then I'll be fine.

Or at least to the next coughing fit that would remind me that I'm not fine.

Shit.